Lightning Crashes

In a previous post, I mentioned about some ‘glamour photos’ I took back when I was a college student- my first attempts at fashion photography and fashion design, actually. Well, I’ve found the photos. At least, what’s left of them. I regret putting them in a scrapbook. I had grand plans for said scrapbook but said plans never came into fruition. Several things happened that turned my world upside down and before I had time to contemplate on what has happened, what’s happening, and what will happen, I became a mother. My priorities shifted and well, some things got pushed back, others buried. Anyway, here’s to resurrection and reckoning. First off:

The young lady in black is Gacy and the tiny tot in the pumpkin suit is Anya, who is now a young lady herself. Oh, how time flies. That black corset top was designed and created by my dear friend Lalaine, whom I miss dearly… Here’s another set of photos taken on the same day. The other young lady, in the above photos, wearing the bridal dress is Summer. By the way, these dresses were my own designs, had them customized. I actually did the prints and embroidery on the dresses.

These photos were all taken in one day less than half a day. I had planned to use natural light as a) I didn’t exactly have the necessary equipment such as lighting, reflector, or a suitable camera, b) I thought it would give me a better chance to get decent shots to make up for the lack of equipment, and c) Photoshop had relatively limited features back then. But then we had to start a bit late in the afternoon, though I had hoped otherwise, and I missed the opportunity. Add to that, I tried to do everything as well- stylist, photographer, director. I think my cousin, Gino (Or, Gia, as she wants to be called now) did the hair and make up? Not sure. Initially, I had planned to shoot five outfits! But I absolutely underestimated the time needed to prepare and do everything. Typical. Admittedly, I was very naive, ambitious, and, yes, impulsive. I thought it was very simple. I didn’t have the resources to do my ideal shoot, but I was initially convinced I would be able to pull it off. But when the realization that it wasn’t at all very simple set in, I started to get frustrated and discouraged. I’m trying to remember how the shoot went some 20 years ago. It’s kinda fuzzy but I have a nagging feeling that towards the end of the shoot, I might have been a bit of a prick. Perhaps, that’s an understatement? Or perhaps I’m simply overreacting? I hope so. Thinking back, I could imagine myself getting pissed, but not to anyone else but myself. I remember feeling confident at one time, then absolutely discouraged the next, thinking that I was being very ambitious and that won’t be able to pull off the stint quite successfully. But looking at the photos, my models seem to be  smiling pretty and quite genuinely, yes? But, if I had indeed acted untoward,  my sincerest apologies to Gacy and Summer.

Typically, with my frustrations brimming to the full, I tend to speak less. Add to that the fact that my face is given to exaggeration, such that my frown would already seem like a scowl. So, others are likely to take my behavior differently. But in hindsight, I shouldn’t have felt scared of failing. There was no competition. The stint was an experiment and I had planned it to be fun. Unfortunately, I wasn’t as zen as I’d like to be then. I had so many ideas that I didn’t quite know how to put together. It was frustrating. I’ve always played by instinct, which hasn’t really worked well to my advantage.

Well, I’ve said more than I’d care to share. But this had been a bit therapeutic,to say the least. Hope, you dear reader, is not put off, though. I’ve a few more pages of this scrapped book to post. Do check back in a few days i you don’t mind.

Thanks for dropping by.


2 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Trackback: DIY: One-sleeved Jersey Tunic | a rogue planet
  2. Trackback: April Fools’… | a rogue planet

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